Sunday, January 18, 2009

Feeling Better

What a relief it is to not take the interferon and ribaviron. My energies are returning more every day and my brain beginning to stutter into life. Hooray. Got a well timed email from my Chinese Medicine Practitioner and have arranged to see her on Feb 2nd. She will put me back on track. TCM has been very helpful to me combating Hep C over the years and I hope it will aid me in my quest to keep my viral load down as low as it is now. A viral load of 200,000 may not be good enough for the docs but if I can keep it down to anything like that level I'll be a happy man. I am lucky the Yuan Clinic is so close. (see link)

As for writing, I have printed off the whole of Mr Reed with a view of reading the whole thing prior to starting work on a Second Draft. Naturally, I have still been thinking about Prometheus and intend to develop detailed character backgrounds on the main characters. I want them really be grounded in me before beginning to write. I'll post the backgrounds here.

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

End of Chapter One

Well, that's it then. Treatment is over. I saw my nurse, discussed all the ins and outs and, despite my viral load steadily reducing, my Log Number was way too low. As their Hep C expert said in his email, 'continued treatment would be futile.'

Having invested so much in this process I am naturally very disappointed. I recall at the beginning of researching Prometheus the issue of false hope arose. Now I understand it more deeply. It is odd how the mind creates all these unrealistic expectations. Even since finishing treatment I have had thoughts saying, 'The viral load is really low, perhaps I can clear it completely without the drugs from here, that would be one-in-the-eye of the doctors.' I guess its good to be positive, but one wonders where madness lays.

Now, I need to be monitored to see what the long term effects of this treatment will be. At least I have learnt this form of treatment is of no benefit to me. Of course, there are rumours of new treatments coming along that may help me. I expect at some point in the not too distant future I will be going through all this again. Dare I hope for a positive outcome someday? As Chris commented, this is only success postponed. Though I am aware my age is against me.

Speaking personally, I just want to get my life back. This difficult process has made me value living much more. It is clear my health is unlikely to ever improve much. This is the fittest I will ever be, so I need to enjoy it while I can. As long as my liver holds out I am determined to experience and enjoy this world.

As for the blog, I feel this is only the end of Chapter One. I will concentrate on the development of the novel until the new treatments come along. My normal Hep C state is at least better than being on Interferon, so hopefully I should begin to write more. Completing 'Mr. Reed' and 'Prometheus' has become even more important for me. They will be something worthy of leaving behind.

To everyone who has read and commented on the blog so far. Your support has been invaluable. I cannot express how grateful I am for it. I will try to continue to make the blog of some interest to you.

May Fate be kind to you all and Evolution bless your offspring.

This is not The End my friends.